Shadow work prompts
Shadow work means writing honestly about the parts of yourself you'd rather not look at: the reaction that felt too big, the trait that irritates you in other people, the want you keep quiet. The idea comes from the psychiatrist Carl Jung. It's a popular reflective practice with no trials behind it, and it isn't a treatment.
How to use these prompts. Pick one and stay with it for five or ten minutes. A few a week is plenty; nobody finishes this list. If a prompt opens something too big to hold alone, stop there and tell someone you trust or a professional.
Reactions that feel too big
Start here. When something small gets a big reaction, a part of you that's usually out of view may have just shown up, and it's easier to catch it this week than to go looking for it in your past.
Describe the moment before you explain it.
What's something small that got under my skin this week? Describe exactly what happened, as a camera would have seen it.
Answer this with JoyThe reaction I had was ___, and if I'm honest, the size of it was ___ out of 10.
Answer this with JoyWhere did that reaction show up in my body first, and what did my body want to do?
Answer this with JoyWhat did I tell myself in that moment about the other person, or about me?
Answer this with JoyIf someone I trust had watched the whole thing, what would they have noticed that I didn't?
Answer this with JoyWhen has a reaction like this happened before, and what did those moments have in common?
Answer this with JoyWhat I judge in other people
Jung's observation was that people often meet the parts of themselves they don't accept in someone else first.1 These prompts turn a judgment around, slowly, to see whether any of it fits you. Some of it won't.
A trait in other people that bothers me more than it seems to bother others is ___.
Answer this with JoyWhen I judge people who are ___, what, if anything, does it touch on in me?
Answer this with JoyWhen have I done a small version of the thing I judge? What was going on for me then?
Answer this with JoyIf this trait bothered me a little less, what would change for me?
Answer this with JoyEnvy and admiration
Envy stings. It's also a pointer, often at something you want and haven't let yourself want out loud.
Whose life, work or ease did I feel a pang about recently, and what exactly did they have?
Answer this with JoyIf I could have one piece of what they have, which piece would I pick?
Answer this with JoyWhat would I do differently this month if I took that want seriously?
Answer this with JoyWho do I admire without any envy at all, and what do I admire in them?
Answer this with JoyThe rules I live by
A hidden part is often held in place by a rule about who you're allowed to be: never angry, never needy, always the one who copes. Once the rule is written down, you can look at it instead of through it.
Which "should" do I hear most often in my own voice, and whose voice did it start in?
Answer this with JoyIf I rewrote the rule to fit the person I am now, what would it say?
Answer this with JoyThe parts I keep out of sight
The small daily edits: the laugh you swallow, the opinion you round off, the tiredness you cover with "fine", the things you tidy away before anyone sees them. Pick one moment from this week.
What do I tend to apologize for, even when no one asked for an apology?
Answer this with JoyWhen did I last act fine when I wasn't, and what did I need instead?
Answer this with JoyWhat feeling do I find hardest to let other people see: anger, sadness, fear, need, or something else?
Answer this with JoyIf the hidden part of me could write one line in this journal, what would it say?
Answer this with JoyStrengths I play down
Jung's shadow holds good qualities too, the ones a person learned to keep small.1 It is the easiest group to skip.
What am I good at that I tend to brush off when someone mentions it?
Answer this with JoyWhen did I last hold back an idea, a laugh or an opinion, and what would have happened if I hadn't?
Answer this with JoyA compliment I find hard to accept is ___. The part of it that might be true is ___.
Answer this with JoyWhat did I love doing at some point that I stopped, and what made me stop?
Answer this with JoyIf I let myself take up a little more room this week, where would I start?
Answer this with JoyAfter you write
An entry left open follows you into the rest of the day. One of these closes it.
What's one thing I noticed today that I'd like to remember, without having to fix it?
Answer this with JoyWhat ordinary thing will I do next to come back to my day: a glass of water, a walk, a song?
Answer this with JoyWhy there are no childhood wound prompts here
Plenty of shadow work lists ask you to dig up your earliest wounds. We left them out.
A prompt like "what childhood wound still shapes you?" assumes a cause you may not have; it tells you there is one and sends you to find it.
Writing about a painful past event also left students more upset right after writing, in the classic study where it helped later (how journaling works covers that research).2 Alone, at night, with no one to slow things down, that's a lot to carry.
And old hurts are work a trained therapist paces with you, which a list can't do. If something from your past keeps surfacing, between entries as well as during them, it deserves that kind of help.
Jung's word, and the trials nobody has run
Carl Jung used "shadow" for the parts of a personality that a person doesn't recognize or accept as their own.1 What's sold as shadow work today is a loose mix of his ideas, self-help books and social media.
We searched PubMed on October 29, 2026, for controlled trials of shadow work as a practice. We found none.
The prompts above are built from three smaller moves that have been tested, which is why they ask what happened, step back from it, and end kindly:
- Step back to look. People who viewed an upsetting memory from a distance, as an observer, could think about why it happened with less of the hot feeling coming back.3
- Write the thoughts too. Writing about both thoughts and emotions after a stressful event went with seeing more benefit in it than writing about emotions alone.4
- Be kind on purpose. Self-compassion exercises reduced self-criticism across 27 randomized trials, though the review flagged possible publication bias.5
Questions people ask
Can you give me an example of shadow work?
Here's an example entry, written for this page: "My sister was ten minutes late and I snapped at her. Size of it: 8 out of 10. Body: hot face, wanted to leave. What I told myself: she doesn't take me seriously. Before: every time my plans get treated as optional. What I want: to say that out loud before I'm angry." It starts with one small moment and ends on a want, without a verdict on who you are.
Is shadow work safe?
Mostly, yes. Gentle prompts like these are ordinary journaling. The risk rises when a prompt pushes you into old pain alone, or when you're writing while already in crisis. If you start to feel unsafe, stop and reach out; in the US you can call or text 988.
How do I start shadow work as a beginner?
Take one recent, small moment from "Reactions that feel too big" and describe it the way a camera would. Skip any prompt that doesn't fit you. That's a full first session.
Is shadow work evidence-based?
No. Its name comes from Jung's writing rather than from a study, and we found no trials of it. The parts we could source are the three moves above.
What should I do after a shadow work session?
Get up and do something with your hands for a few minutes. If the session stirred up a lot, you can talk it through with Joy or call someone you trust instead of sitting alone with it.
More prompts and tools
For a lighter start, try the journal prompts. For the kinder side of this work, see journal prompts for self-love. If a judgment of yourself keeps looping, the thought record can help you look at it step by step.