Dread
Dread is fear of a specific thing you know is coming: a hard conversation, a test result, a Monday meeting, a bill. General worry roams. Dread has a date and a shape.
- On the wheel: Scared, then dreading
- More exact words: Apprehensive, tense
- Nearby: Worried, anxious, relieved
- Often points to: A known event ahead, and a wait you can't skip
Sunday night, Thursday's review
Sunday evening before a week you're not ready for. The stomach drop when the calendar reminder pops up. A heavy, slow feeling colors everything until the thing is over, and then it lifts, sometimes all at once.
Apprehensive is the lighter version, uneasy about something ahead that might go badly. Tense is the body's version: braced, as if waiting for impact.
"My performance review is on Thursday. It's Monday and I've already rehearsed it in my head about thirty times."
A stronger shock, sooner
Some people, offered the choice, took a stronger electric shock right away over a weaker one later.1
That came from a brain imaging study by Gregory Berns and colleagues, in which people waited for mild shocks of different strengths and delays. For the strong dreaders, activity in brain areas tied to attention to pain rose faster during the wait, and the researchers concluded that dread comes partly from attention to the expected experience, on top of fear.1
The dentist visit takes 30 minutes. The dread took the whole week.
Dread or anxiety?
| Dread | Anxiety | |
|---|---|---|
| What it's about | One known event | Many possible ones |
| Timing | Has a date | Open-ended |
| Ends when | The event is over | Often moves to a new worry |
If your mind is jumping between many "what ifs", the anxious page fits better. Dread tends to end in relief once the day comes.
Shortening the wait
- Move it sooner if you can. If attention during the wait drives dread, a shorter wait means less of it.1 Book the call for Monday morning instead of Friday.
- Plan the first five minutes. Write exactly how the event starts: "I walk in, sit down, say I'm glad we're meeting." Dread grows around a blank.
- Write the feared outcome and the date you'll know. Then check it on that date; worry time covers what people found when they did this.
- Give your attention somewhere to go. Dread feeds on attention to what's coming, so a full afternoon beats an empty one.1
Then plan something kind for after. It gives your mind a second thing to look ahead to, and a coffee with a friend counts.
What exactly are you dreading, and what is the first moment of it you could get through? Write that moment, step by step.
Answer this with JoyQuestions people ask about dread
What is the meaning of dread?
As a noun, a strong fear or reluctance about something that is going to happen. As a verb, to look ahead to something with fear. The thing is in the future; the feeling is now.
What is a feeling of impending doom?
An intense sense that something terrible is about to happen, often with no clear cause. It can come with panic, and sometimes with a medical problem. A sudden feeling of doom with chest pain or trouble breathing needs emergency care.
Why do I wake up with dread every morning?
The day ahead may hold something hard, or stress may have built up. If it happens most mornings for weeks, raise it with a doctor, since lasting worry and trouble relaxing are among the signs of generalized anxiety disorder.2
Related
- Anxious: worry about many things that might happen.
- Overwhelmed: too much right now.
- Regret: the feeling that can follow a choice you dreaded making.